Port Sanilac Times

February 8th, 1858

 Fifteen years ago this place was not known as a village. The first known about this place in particular was about thirty years since if I have been correctly informed. Some men came here to peel tan bark and built a shanty near the shore and covered it with bark and it being on a point got to be Bark Shanty point, which name we held onto and made honorable, respectable, notorious, anyway you please to call it, till last summer when we got the name of our post office changed through the influence of our postmaster.

 Like most other new places this has had its ups and downs and has been famous for manufacturing lumber, exporting shingles, extensive fisheries. Also for petty lawsuits but has been noted for a very religious community.

 But most of the first settlers have moved on and the place now looks & has a different aspect. The surrounding country is being settled and now one can hear the sound of woodsmen felling the trees, which are doomed to go down to civilization, like the ancient tribes of the forest disappeared before the progress of civilization. In a few years more we will be surrounded by cleared improved and well tilled farms and then it will not be necessary as it has been to import produce but we expect to be able to export it.

 Not more than thirty years since, Chicago had to be supplied with flour, potatoes and provisions from Ohio, New York and Michigan but now the tables are turned and Chicago has been one of the greatest exporting towns. We don’t pretend to compare our village to Chicago but to show what has been done.

 But we do contend that we do have a good country of land and all the elements necessary to make a good farming community. We have timber of the best quality in great abundance and excellent soil and water that cant be beat in the world and a hardy, industrious, persevering, honest community.

 Roads are essential to the settlement of any country. We have a good soil to build roads on, only it is a work of time. Trees have to be cleared off and the roots will rot in 3 or 4 years so that it can be turnpiked.

 First we say we have all the elements necessary to make good farms of, a good soil, plenty of good water and the best of timber, in fact it has been the large quantities of pine timber that has kept us back, for if the settlers from the first has concentrated all their means and force to clearing their farms and depended more on raising crops and less on lumbering our town would look very different from what it now does.

 In the place of having 4 or 5 acres about half cleared and less than half tilled we should see 20, 30 or 40 acres well cleared off and fenced, good houses and barnes and young orchards growing and in the winter in place of seeing loads of shingles, staves and logs coming to the market, we should see our enterprising and thrifty farmers bringing in loads of wheat, corn, oats, pork and hay to exchange for cash or its equivalent. And all this we expect to see in a few years more.

We don’t argue that in reality our town is any poorer for having large quantities of pine. No, but we mean that as long as the pine lasts the majority of the first settlers will neglect to cultivate their land as long as they can find good shingle timber and what little experience we have goes to prove that those who neglect to cultivate their land and depend entirely on making shingles or getting out logs, staves or posts will barely make out to live.

 And then after all the timber is gone and the last old shingle tree is cut and worked up, they have to commence and clear off a place for a potato patch. Lumbering to be successful requires a large amount of capital and experience to conduct it with any certainty of success, which but a very few have.

In all new settled places it has been remarked that but a very few of the first settlers, the pioneers remain till the forests disappear and the wilderness is converted into well tilled farms, with good roads running in every direction when as they say, they can begin to live. They have felled the trees, logged up, burnt up, grubbed up and fenced up till the hardest work is done.

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For the Bark Shanty Times-Who ever heard of Kansas? They say the damakrats have split and that one Backcannon has carried part of em off clean up to Salt river and that Mr. Duglis has got to ether part of em and is going to make squatters of um.

Well if them damakrats aren’t the tarndest fools you ever did see-they say Kansas is to squat- or the people must stick to squatertys or squaterness or something about squateringness.

This Duglis they say is a smart feller-but I cant see what he means by talking so much about squattin in Kansas and all in their own way. He says they must do everything they want to in their own way-and then squat too if they want to. He says the niggers wont come to squat there. But Mr. Backgammon says niggers is horses and that Kansas is a good place to keep such animals as they get fat there.

But these here damakrats are kind of wiggling all over the country and ever since Backgammon has got to be President they have kind of wiggled into office and I kinda by how some of um twists and works that they would like to wiggle out again.

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Yesterday, quite a sensation was got up about town about a certain hog. One Mr. Woodberight claimed one of squire Buncomes shoats-they said the pig has a very curious tail, two kinks and one twist and a spot-hair all over, black with red and white spots and has ears just like her father.

 And one Mr. Willhave claimed said pig and went straightway to Squire Function to get out papers to take said pig home legally and in kindness to Mr. Woodberight for said pig was an awful big eater. And directly said papers were put into the hands of Mr.

Readyforajob and forthwith said pig was marched off a wiser and better hog.

 And Mr. Willhave and Squire Buncome looked, the last we saw of them, with a complacent kind of countenance toward all hogdom.

There is to be an eclipse of the sun this year. We heard so by the latest telegraphic dispatch.

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 A big nose is a sure sign.

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The latest news from Nikerogry is that Gen. Walker has got knocked up & his men have cum hum. How ungrateful them Nikerogryians are for they wont consent to be civilized by us Christians.

February 11th, 1858

Mr. Editor:

     Dear Sir:

 As our legislature has again been in session I thought you would like to know what has been done and for your information and for the information of the public I will give you a few hints of their doings and the first thing I will notice is this,

 The swamp land question-They have deviated from the purposes for which the lands were granted to us by the government. They were granted for the express purpose of draining the land, but they have appropriated the lands for other purposes mostly. In the first place they have made a law to sell them for ten shillings per acre, one fourth of the proceeds to go for draining the lands, one fourth for the primary schools and the balance to go for the purpose of building a female seminary in the southern part of the state.

 Humbug says you-so say I.

 Wouldn’t I laugh to see them make use of those lands for any other purpose than for which they were granted to us by the government.

 I understand by our honorable representative, James Erskine, Esq. that he has done something pretty nice for our state road running from this place to Watrousville in Tuscola County.

 They have repealed the Port Huron road and got an appropriation of six miles on each side of the road of the non-resident land to build the road with. Well, I think this looks more like building a road then it did before with only one mile on each side.

 I think now we shall get a road and a good one in a few years and if we get a good road back from this place we may hope to have the “Times” printed in beautiful type and power press and our now little village will become the county seat of Sanilac county and a large and populous place and our editor an honored and wealthy man.     Citizen

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News items.

Last night there was a party at Kansas and the Port Sanilac gents and ladies were down and had a jolly time of it. As near as we can learn two sleighs were broken and how many hearts we do not know.

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 J.C. Myllis informs us that most of the Democrats of Lexington have deserted Buck & Brake and have come over and made good soldiers for the Republican ranks.

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The Cass hunters came in today and chartered for strong men to go in with them and pack out elk beef as fast as they kill it and we no doubt shall be supplied with plenty of beef and venison in a few days.

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Port Sanilac Market-Produce is bringing a good price and but little in the market. Flour $5.75 to 6.50; Buckwheat flour $2.25 to 2.50; Corn meal $1.75 to 2.00; Pork very firm and few sails (winds being light); Shingles in good demand and worth from $1.50 to 2.00; Butter .20 to .25; Hay $10.00 to 12.00; Beans $1.75 to 2.00; Money tight and none to be got save now and then a shilling for a pound of butter. Whiskey firm and sells at 50 cents per gal. Candy apiece; chewing gum 1 cent stick; matches 3 cents box; Nuts 2 for a cent; Cod 8 cents lb. Bricks none in market; stones all froze up.

February 12th, 1858

KNOCKdown and dragout in congress

We learn from our Prosecuting Attorney that on last Friday and Saturday there was a fracus which ended in a regular field fight in our Congressional halls.

It seems that the member from Pennsylvania, a Republican was walking in one of the alleys of the Democratic side of the house and the member from South Carolina, a democrat, asked him what business he had there and the Pennsylvania man said it was a public place and he had as much business there as any man.

And the member from South Carolina took the other by the throat and the man from Penn knocked him down and then they all piled in and had a free fight and Mr. Washbern from Ill, a heavy man maid good his strokes for every time he struck he laid out a man.

Now it is not a shame to have such works in our National Ligislatur in a civilized and Christian country. I say for shame on such folks. They are not fit to live in a Christian land. Send them among the heathen where they belong and rid the country of such wretches.     Ceaser.

February 13th, 1858

FIRE-FIRE-Imlay, Smith and Kelleys grist mill took fire and burned down yesterday-about three o’clock-we have been told there was an insurance for $4,000.00.

FIRE-L. Fergusons house caught fire at ½ past ten oclock this morning and before the fire was discovered it has spread all through the upper story and was impossible to extinguish it. At the same time the wind blew very heavy from the east. The most of the furniture was saved-No insurance.

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Mr. Editor-On reading the several articles which have made their appearance in this journal, it has occurred to me that a few words of advice to some of your would be correspondents would not be out of place.

I will in the first place inform you for the benefit of those who so far have patronized your journal with a portion of the little bit of which they are possessed, that there is a weekly, evening spelling school held in our school house of which privilege I would advise them to avail themselves as soon as possible.

Take “Ceaser” for instance and inform him that by attending this school he might “be maid” to spell somewhat more like our standard Webster, a mixture of Webster’s orthography and that of our worthy Ceasers half dutch style of the same science does not at all harmonize. I would therefore commend him to the study of English spelling, that is if the bump of self conceit does not prevent his knightship from adhering to my friendly advice. You shall hear again from…Observer.

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Mr. Editor-Port Sanilac Times-What a whining set of democrats you have about your place-the impression on a stranger would be that they are a sickly, puny, scrawny set to hear them talk and groan about the republicans. One would think the state and country and town and their whole party was on their last legs and would soon all go to the devil. If they are to be believed the state is bankrupt and the town is bankrupt and the country is bankrupt and it is the republicans that have done it all and for which deeds of infamy, never to be forgiven, they shower their choicest benedictions on the devoted heads of all republicans, without regard to age, sex or condition.

Without much doubt they feel very much chafed and galled to be drove away from the public crib after feeding there so long and getting fat on public spoils and then to be driven away up on the flats of salt river to browse. To be continued.

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LAW-LAW-One Mr. McGregor has taken Mr. Alex Finlayson with a warrant. Feb 16th at 3 oclock P.M. appeared above said Alex before Squire function & forthwith Mr Alex called for a jury & directly all the best and soundest jurors in town are sitting with open mouths and ears to catch all the evidence pro and con.

Suit commenced by jury sworn and the Hon James Yakes appears for the people of Mich.

The defendant plead his own case and first “Baldy” takes the stand (looking squinty) and says the last time he saw a stake stuck was five years ago. He knows a stake and has seen a post and knows a post, a gate post or bed post or cedar post but said deponent saith not which.

Mike Maskell sworn and says he knows a stake that was stuck and said stake, one end was up and tother end down and he seen a stake 15 years ago all stuck and he knows a post and has seen a post somewhere sometime but said deponent does not say if it was a gate post or a sign post or a bed post or cedar post but was sure he has seen a stuck stake with one end in and the other end out and then said deponent got stuck and quit.

Then Mr A comes and says he has seen a stake stuck but did not know how said stake got stuck and quit.

Then the council for the plaintiff took the floor, said council being Mr. James Yakes, and fascinated the audience with his eloquence for about 15 minutes and talked about stuck stakes and stakes not stuck, of stakes in and of stakes out, if stakes that was and of stakes that was not and about all kinds of stakes except beef steaks.

 And now comes Mr A. Finlayson to defend himself and of all the other stakes that was stuck, he stuck the most foolish stake and acknowledged he unstuck said stake of contention and made out said stake was too short and too long, too big and too little and finally said jurors stuck their stake and brot a verdict of guilty of unstucking a stuck stake and consequently said Justice stuck said A.F. in for $10 fine and then we left.

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Advertisement-Hotel-Erskine House, located in the center of town opposite the N.R.R. depot, omnibus to and from free of charge. Meals 25 cents. Good barn, stables and a first rate hostler, lively, young, smart, game and good looking which qualities are rarely found combined, but without doubt every grateful horse appreciates said qualities.

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At #45 Lake St.-Clothes, Satinett, Fustian, Jeanes, Factory, Prints, Linsey, Diaper, Ribbons, Laces, Edging; Blankets, Corn, Dishes, Boots, Bonnets, Buckwheat, Rice, Rakes, Stoves, Shovels, Sugar, Soap, Onions, Saws, Candles, Candy, Crackers, Cash, and articles too numerous to mention.

February 22nd, 1858

By request we give the following an insertion.

Peoples Ticket

     Supervisor:  C.W. Joiner

     Township Clerk:  Jacob Harder

     Justice of the Peace: Harvey G. Wheeler

     Treasurer:  Ensign Hill

     Highway Comm.: Joseph Moore

     School Inspector: Uri Raymond

     Overseer of Poor: Adam Irvine

                                              Frederick Platts

                                              John Mullen

     Constables: Miles Watrous

                                 Wm Aitken

                                  Andrew McKenzie

                                  Saml Hinkson

 

Democratic Ticket

     Supervisor: Judge Muggins

     Clerk:  Lewis Cass     Mich

     Twp Treasurer:  James Buchanan     Penn

     Justice of Piece:  Judge Lecompe     R.T.

     Highway Comm:  Mike Maskell

     School Insp:   J.C. Bennett     N.Y.

     Constables : James Erskine     Mich

                                 Robt J. Walker     Miss

                                 Geo W. Peck     Mich

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Never too late-It is never too late to do right, as for instance a gentleman began to study grammar after he had written for the press ten years. It is never too late to get married. Naomi, the daughter of Enoch, took her first husband at the age of five hundred and eighty. It is never too late to drop a bad habit. James, the novelist wrote sixty-nine volumes before he could shake off his “Solitary Horseman”. It is never too late to be a wide awake character. An old gentleman who has ceased to read the “Daily Evening Blunderbuss” has entirely recovered from the sleepiness that used to afflict him. It is sometimes too late to pop the “question”. A man once did so to a charming widow just as she had reached the house after burying her first husband. “You are too late” was the reply, “the deacon just spoke to me at the grave.”

True character is shown more clearly in trifles than in great deeds.

If you want an ignoramus to respect you, wear a watch seal the size of a brickbat.

February 27th, 1858

Mr. Editor:

 What is a man is a question that has been asked time without number, and as many answers given all of which to my mind are indefinite.

I propose to give a new definition to the above question.

Start not Mr Editor when I inform you that a man is an alligator. The alligator is an amphibious animal. The female lays her eggs in the sun to hatch and if it were not for a certain bird which knows their habits which digs them up for food they would soon over-run the earth and destroy even man.

Man is amphibious. He lives both on land and water and adapts himself to the varied circumstances of his checkered existence and demand blackmail at least from all that dare oppose his dominion. The vulnerable or weakest part of the alligator is his stomach. The weakest part of man is his belly or appetite.

Let the young wife fascinate her lord with delicious food and herbaceous beverage of the celestial or the far famed berry of Java.

 Let her, so to speak, only bring him into habits of inebriation with the sweet charms of her skill in the culinary art.

Let the hearth be a bed of ease and with feet in slippers all the ferocity of his nature will die within him and a feeling of satisfaction not only with himself but with all his surroundings will come over him as surely as with the alligator when its stomach is gorged with a full meal.

Such is my definition of man with all his boasted attainments whether physical, moral or intellectual.

What a picture and how humiliating.

Do try your hand Mr Editor to restore him to his pristine magnificence.     Alex

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Man that is born of woman as small potatoes and few in a hill.

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Republican Ticket

Supervisor:   Wm Thomson

Clerk:  John Thomson

Treasurer:  Tom Thomson

Justice of Peace:  Wm Thomson Jr

School Insp:  James Yakes    Attorney

Constables:  John Kelly

                            James Erskine

                             Wm VanCamp

                             James Thomson

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Man is a thing which long has been

A puzzle to himself and everything else

He lives, he moves, he eats, he sleeps

He runs and walks and crawls and creeps

He breathes, he feels, he sees, he hears

He has a body, arms, legs, head and ears.

 

Is man a beast, a fish, reptile or a bird, or as Alex said an alligator? Man is God’s best earthly creature.

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What is man?

Man is said to be an alligator

Of an ill disposed and rambling nature

If he finds a corner stake he claims an acre

But if accused of stealing he pretends to be an innocent creature

If an alligator finds a stake stuck in the future

Let him not be tempted to remove it by either Calvin or Luther

As there is a beast of prey if a second time you vex him

He certainly will take Mr. Alligator down to Jackson

So now my alligator friend give up your noise

If you don’t the constable will shut your alligator jaws.